SPEECH NO. 1 - INTRODUCTION OF ONESELF (delivered in August 2006)
Title: MY LIFE, THUS FAR...
The esteemed President of the Sultan Toastmasters’ Club, Ms. Marie Fernandez; my fellow toastmasters; our beloved guests; ladies and gentlemen.
It has been five (5) weeks since I first joined the Toastmasters’ Club. I would not be ashamed to admit that it is kind of difficult for me to do the very first speech required of a member. This speech may even be the easiest among all the speeches because I would just be talking about myself and nothing else. But, why do I find it a bit difficult to do this first speech? Am I reluctant to tell you who I am? Am I hesitant to reveal to you who I really am? Have you ever read the book entitled “Why Am I Afraid To Tell You Who I Am?” written by a Jesuit priest named Fr. John Powell? I cannot recall everything about the book because it has been years since I read it. But, I do remember one of the reasons stated there on why we often hesitate to tell others who we really are – it is that -- we are scared that others may not accept and love us for what we really are.
Anyway, after thinking several times, I was able to, finally, convince myself to deliver my first speech. Knowing that my life, after all, is not as colorful nor as controversial as the lives of some famous people we know of (like the late Princess Di), I don’t see why I should hesitate to tell you about myself tonight. Still, if my tongue slips and I reveal something I should not reveal, I trust that you will keep it within the four walls of this room. Deal? Or, no deal?
I am Alice Kalaw and I am the youngest in a family of four -- all of whom happen to be girls. I thought all the while, and, I would want to continue thinking that I was my daddy’s pet and my mom’s favorite little girl until my siblings and I exchanged experiences about our relationship with our parents. To my surprise, everyone thought she was the favorite child. I hold no grudge against my parents. All the more that I admired and respected them for the equal treatment they gave each one of us.
I studied in an exclusive all-girls school. I finished my college education from the oldest catholic and the only pontifical university in the Philippines
For those who are interested to know, I am currently single. I said currently because I used to be “double.” I am blessed with two lovely, lovely daughters. The first one already graduated from the De La Salle University a few years back and the younger one is in her 2nd year college at the Ateneo de Manila University.
As a young girl, I was so sickly. I often had severe asthma attacks. Serious enough because almost always I ended up being confined in the hospital. Although doctors found it hard to tell who the patient was whenever I was in the hospital room with my friends and siblings.
As a mother, I am very much like my mom, loving, caring and thoughtful. One of our differences, though, is that I am an overly protective mother. I guess she was also one but I hardly noticed it when I was young. For example, I wouldn’t allow my daughters to go biking, skate boarding, diving and the like. These activities would surely make my heart beat faster and pound harder.
As an employee, I am very dedicated, loyal and hard working. My loyalty should be obvious since I will be celebrating my 30th anniversary with the bank very soon.
As a boss, I am strict and straightforward but I am kind to my people. I always find balance between work and people. I want things done correctly and on time but I see to it that my people are happy. I lead by example (and walk the talk).
So, who am I when I am outside the bank? I am just like any ordinary person who usually wakes up with her hair in disarray and who needs to brush her teeth before going to bed. I love fun and I am also fun to be with. I love to cook and to entertain people. I love to paint and I adore the paintings of Paul Cezanne. I get a lot of inspiration from the works of Vincent Van Gogh. I love to read. I read books that could help me further hone my skills as a banker, and those that could help me become a better person. Last, but not least, I love to learn new things. I get a lot of fulfillment from exploring new frontiers and discovering that I can actually do certain things that I never knew I could do… until I tried.
What about inside me as a person? As a person, I live by what I believe. I am highly influenced by my dad and I can still remember some of the things he taught me as a young girl. Among other things, my father used to advise me to “Paddle my own canoe and never chew more than what I can swallow.” I do not like loud and disrespectful people. One of the things I dislike most is gossip. It destroys relationships. And, I do not want to be prejudiced towards someone I haven’t met yet.
Although I consider myself as a highly-principled woman, it doesn’t mean I am the hyper-serious type. I can be surprisingly funny. And, sometimes, extremely funny. And, why not? My real ambition was to become a professional comedian. Really! Believe it or not.
For the things I have so far achieved in life, I would like to attribute them to my one and only best friend who was always there for me. Maybe the only person who knows me quite well, my soul mate and my everything. This person I am referring to is the wind beneath my wings in all that I have been through.
My introduction of myself would not be complete if I will not tell you one more thing. Although my name is similar to that of the main character in Lewis Carroll’s fantasy novel “Alice
Life, they say, is a journey with many surprises –some of which are going to be happy, some of which are going to be sad. I do not know what lies in store for me in the remaining years of my life’s journey. But, whatever awaits me down the next bend, I know that God will be there with me as He has always been with me all these years. I have nothing to fear. I know that I will not—and I will never be—alone.
Madame President, my fellow Toastmasters, beloved guests, this has been my life, thus far…
SPEECH NO. 2 - (delivered in October 2006)
Title: MY THOUGHTS ON DEATH
Our Area Governor, Madam Fe Pecision;
the incumbent President of the Sultan Toastmasters’ Club, Ms. Marie Fernandez;
my fellow toastmasters;
our beloved guests;
ladies and gentlemen, good evening!
Twenty six years ago, my mom, at age 62, had her first and last high blood pressure attack. She did not survive it.
I can still vividly remember how her cold, lifeless body lay on the wooden floor of our dining room. Everyone in the family ran to her rescue, except me. I couldn’t go near my mom. I couldn’t bear to see her in pain and watch her slowly losing her breath …. We rushed her to the emergency room of the UST hospital, hoping she would survive the attack. I cannot describe to you how shattered we were when we were told that she was already clinically dead and had a zero per cent chance to live. Because she was still breathing and fighting for her life, we repeatedly whispered to her not to go, not to leave us, hoping she’d hear our pleas. We were all crying out to God, “Please God, please do not take our mom away from us. Please! We love her so much and we don’t want her to go. . .” But, despite our pleas and prayers, we could not stop mom from leaving us. Her time, as they say, had come.
My mom’s death was – and still is – the most tragic thing that I have ever experienced in this life. But, at the same time, her death has been the most important lesson I have ever learned about life. Tonight, my fellow Toastmasters, I would like to share with you those lessons which my mom’s death has taught me over the last twenty six years.
You see, death is one of the things we dread so much in our lives. Whether it is the death of our loved ones, or of our close friends, or maybe of our own selves – death terrifies us so much, we prefer not to talk about it or even think about it.
One of the terrifying things about death is that it can knock on the doors of our lives ANYTIME. No one can ever say, “I am too young to die. Or, “I am too healthy,” or “too important,” or “too powerful to die.” Death does not take those things into account. Death has the power to take away the life of both the old and the young, the sick and the healthy, the unimportant and the important, the powerless and the powerful. That is why, someone once called death “the great equalizer.” All of us are equal as far as death is concerned. All of us can be taken away by death anytime.
Not only that, death can also strike us anywhere. We can literally die anywhere – even in places we don’t normally associate with death.
But, death is not only terrifying. It is also profoundly saddening. I can think of no other human experience more painful and more heartbreaking than death. Most of us have lost a loved one at one point or another in our lives. We all know what it means to be bereaved, to be overwhelmed by the sorrow of losing someone…
I still feel that way about death, even if it has been twenty six years since I saw my mom die. But, over the years, I have found a way to deal with the horror and sadness of death. Every time I feel terrified or saddened by the prospect of death, I try my best to overcome my feelings by turning to my faith and reminding myself of what my faith teaches me about death.
Death – my faith tells me -- is not the end of life, but its beginning. It is not the termination of life but its commencement. Yes, death will destroy our bodies. But we are more than just our bodies. We have a soul; and our soul will not die. It will live on, long after our bodies have died.
Therefore, there is no reason for us to be afraid of death, for it is literally the doorway to our real life.
You know, whenever I am face to face with the horror and sadness of death, I think of butterflies. We all know where butterflies come from, don’t we? Those winged, beautiful creatures we call butterflies actually come from ugly-looking creatures called caterpillars. It’s strange, but it’s true. Sometime in the life of a caterpillar, it gets enveloped inside what we call a cocoon. Inside that cocoon, it dies as a caterpillar. But, simultaneously with its dying as a caterpillar, it gets reborn into a new, beautiful creature which we call a butterfly.
My dear fellow Toastmasters, you and I are caterpillars. And we are on our way to becoming butterflies. But we can never become butterflies unless and until we allow ourselves to be embraced by that mysterious cocoon which we call death.
I know that my mom has become a butterfly, so to speak, after being enveloped by that cocoon. I know that she is out there somewhere, and that she can see me and hear me and even feel me whenever she wants to. So, every time I remember her, I console myself by saying: “I miss you so much, mom. These past twenty six years have not eased my pain about your absence. But, I know I will see you again. Yes, I know I will see you again – in that place where all of us are ultimately going to be … one fine blessed day.”
